This morning was very interesting. I was simply getting ready for work and listening to a teaching of a series I thought I had heard before. But as the teacher was closing the 6 part series, I found myself sitting on my couch with tears streaming down my face in a state of being just totally wrecked by GOD. I mean there I was in my living room completely overtaken by the presence of GOD and crying off the make-up I had just put on.
The story that was being shared this morning was one of a time when the teacher was completely wrecked by GOD. If you’ve never been wrecked by GOD, then I pray that today, even at this moment GOD will begin to wreck you. If you have ever been wrecked by Him, then you know what I mean. I’m not sure I can explain it. It’s kinda like in geometry class when you studied fractals. Learning the basics of them don’t seem very interesting, but then the teacher breaks out an M. C. Escher painting and you see the intricacies that can be easily explained through mathematical equations, but appear as nothing short of magical when they are staring you in your face.
Or it’s like trying to explain seeing Phantom Of The Opera for the first time. You can listen to the soundtrack or even see the movie, but nothing can prepare you for the first time you see the chandelier drop or the water appear under the boat. There are no words which can truly describe it. The same with falling in love, or having a broken heart.
There simply are no words.
This can also be said about being wrecked by GOD. When I say this I mean there are times when GOD totally consumes you with his presence and it is as if all the air is sucked out of the room and you are overwhelmed with the awesomeness of GOD. This has happened to me in many different places. It has happened to me in church services, on mission trips, and at conferences. And honestly this is what we expect, right?
But then there have been times when I am holding a screaming child that just doesn’t want to go to sleep. But I know that he is exhausted and sleep is the one thing he needs, and if he would just listen to me . . . I know what’s best for him if he would only just trust me. And in my frustration I find myself crying out to GOD hoping He will quiet the child with His reassurance. But instead I simply hear the Father saying, “Now you know how I feel.” And I am reminded of a coupe days ago when being obedient to Him meant doing something I didn’t want to. All He was simply doing is trying to get what’s best for me. . . just like I was with the infant in my arms. And I find myself wrecked because I am face to face with the love of a Savior who forgives and is so patient and faithful when I am fighting every step of the way.
Then there have been the times I am driving and I have seen a homeless man walking down the street, and I pray for him and the presence of GOD filled the cab of the truck so strongly I almost have to pull over. And I am wrecked because He is an amazing GOD.
Or one of the students I love so much who has been running full force away from GOD turns and asks for forgiveness, and I have the honor of being there as they turn and run into the arms of the Father. And I am wrecked at His patience.
The phophet Isaiah describes being wrecked like this. . . "Doom! It's Doomsday! I'm as good as dead! Every word I've ever spoken is tainted - blasphemous even! And the people I live with talk the same way, using words that corrupt and desecrate. And here I've looked God in the face! The King! God-of-the-Angel-Armies!" (Isaiah 6:5 MSG)
There are those times in our lives where we understand who GOD is and who we’re not.
And everything else fades away.
And you are simply wrecked and in a posture of complete humility because in His presence there is no other position.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Is trust a feeling or a choice?
When we think of words like trust, love, and forgiveness, I think for most of us, we associate these words with emotions, and while yes, I think that emotions play a part in the entire definition, there is so much more involved in loving, in forgiving and in trusting someone. I think that to fully embrace these things, we must choose to. A big part of that is getting past the emotions that try to tear us down.
Take trusting for example. Yesterday was a rough day for me. I started thinking about having to move in a couple months so I need to get a contract on a new place and all that stuff, which totally is not fun for me. I am not a fan of money and wish I lived in a barter system. But I don’t, and I can’t bury my head either, so I must confront it. Which after getting figures for some places, made me nauseous.
So I found myself anxious and not feeling like I trust GOD. Now I know that ultimately I do. I have banked my life on His Word and am going to follow Him where He leads me, which for now is Georgia. But I don’t always feel like I am trusting Him. In fact yesterday, I had to work through some serious feelings of doubt because I so love where I am now, that I can’t imagine having to live somewhere else. Then I start scamming and scheming in my head all these scenarios to make things work using my own strength and ability, instead of just giving it to Him and choosing to trust Him. The fear that comes from uncertainty so often tries to drown out the choice of trust that I made long ago. It is calling out to me, “Trust Him. Trust the one who loves you. Trust the one who made you. . . ”
I think Mary understood this all too well. Can you imagine how her heart must have felt? I mean of course she was honored and I am sure proud that GOD trusted her so much, but what about the pit that would have been in her stomach knowing she had to tell Joseph or her parents. Even though she wasn’t sure what to do with the news from the angel at first (Luke 1:29), she chooses to trust GOD. Luke 1:38 And Mary said, Yes, I see it all now: I'm the Lord's maid, ready to serve. Let it be with me just as you say.
Wow, what a hard choice that must have been. To push past the feelings and the knowledge that she will be branded with a scarlet letter by her people when she is innocent. Not only is she innocent, she is chosen. GOD chose a plan for Mary that would give Him the most glory, but would take her down a path that was hard and intense. A road that most would never be able to stay on for a day, let alone a lifetime. That's what the picture up top is trying to represent. Notice at the bottom it is easy to see the road. It is easy to trust that you will be able to find your way. But the further down the road you go, the harder it is. The harder to see the road. The harder to breathe, and the lonelier it gets.
In order to live a life that is fully devoted to GOD and a life that chooses to trust GOD, we must push past the desire to base choices simply on feelings. And that includes trust. We must choose to trust and hold onto that choice when the feelings try and pull us away.
Take trusting for example. Yesterday was a rough day for me. I started thinking about having to move in a couple months so I need to get a contract on a new place and all that stuff, which totally is not fun for me. I am not a fan of money and wish I lived in a barter system. But I don’t, and I can’t bury my head either, so I must confront it. Which after getting figures for some places, made me nauseous.
So I found myself anxious and not feeling like I trust GOD. Now I know that ultimately I do. I have banked my life on His Word and am going to follow Him where He leads me, which for now is Georgia. But I don’t always feel like I am trusting Him. In fact yesterday, I had to work through some serious feelings of doubt because I so love where I am now, that I can’t imagine having to live somewhere else. Then I start scamming and scheming in my head all these scenarios to make things work using my own strength and ability, instead of just giving it to Him and choosing to trust Him. The fear that comes from uncertainty so often tries to drown out the choice of trust that I made long ago. It is calling out to me, “Trust Him. Trust the one who loves you. Trust the one who made you. . . ”
I think Mary understood this all too well. Can you imagine how her heart must have felt? I mean of course she was honored and I am sure proud that GOD trusted her so much, but what about the pit that would have been in her stomach knowing she had to tell Joseph or her parents. Even though she wasn’t sure what to do with the news from the angel at first (Luke 1:29), she chooses to trust GOD. Luke 1:38 And Mary said, Yes, I see it all now: I'm the Lord's maid, ready to serve. Let it be with me just as you say.
Wow, what a hard choice that must have been. To push past the feelings and the knowledge that she will be branded with a scarlet letter by her people when she is innocent. Not only is she innocent, she is chosen. GOD chose a plan for Mary that would give Him the most glory, but would take her down a path that was hard and intense. A road that most would never be able to stay on for a day, let alone a lifetime. That's what the picture up top is trying to represent. Notice at the bottom it is easy to see the road. It is easy to trust that you will be able to find your way. But the further down the road you go, the harder it is. The harder to see the road. The harder to breathe, and the lonelier it gets.
In order to live a life that is fully devoted to GOD and a life that chooses to trust GOD, we must push past the desire to base choices simply on feelings. And that includes trust. We must choose to trust and hold onto that choice when the feelings try and pull us away.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Call A Spade A Spade
So if you've ever had an extended conversation with me, you’ve heard this saying. Especially if you’ve ever come to me for advice or heard me teach. “Call a spade a spade” is one of my favorite phrases because it evokes such honesty. Don’t try to pretend something is different than what it really is. Just admit what the real situation is without making excuses. Call a spade a spade.
And this revelation, how important it is to try and see things how they are, removing the rose colored glasses, has probably helped me grow and mature more than anything else. When I was younger, I would make excuses, I would lie to get myself out of situations. I would do this with my family, with my teachers, and even with GOD.
This tendency goes back to the fall (Genesis 3). After Adam and Eve disobeyed GOD, they hid from Him. Reading this breaks my heart how GOD calls out for them. They would always go for a walk in the evening, and after they ate the fruit, they were ashamed so they hid. Of course GOD knew where they were. He had to sit and watch them as they chose to disobey Him and reject His love for them.
Then Adam makes excuse. He said that “the woman you gave me. . .” He didn’t call a spade. He didn’t own up and say I’m sorry GOD, I didn’t listen to you.
And I think this tendency is one of if not the most crippling things in a Christian’s life. Because when we mask, or excuse, or hide our sin, we simply delay the repentance process. But CHRIST came so that we could enjoy life to the fullest (John 10). And in order to this, we must walk in the freedom that comes only from forgiveness. But when we don’t admit that we’ve sinned and try to cover it with something other than the blood of CHRIST, we delay the repentance process.
So in our sin, there is a HUGE need for us to call a spade a spade.
And this revelation, how important it is to try and see things how they are, removing the rose colored glasses, has probably helped me grow and mature more than anything else. When I was younger, I would make excuses, I would lie to get myself out of situations. I would do this with my family, with my teachers, and even with GOD.
This tendency goes back to the fall (Genesis 3). After Adam and Eve disobeyed GOD, they hid from Him. Reading this breaks my heart how GOD calls out for them. They would always go for a walk in the evening, and after they ate the fruit, they were ashamed so they hid. Of course GOD knew where they were. He had to sit and watch them as they chose to disobey Him and reject His love for them.
Then Adam makes excuse. He said that “the woman you gave me. . .” He didn’t call a spade. He didn’t own up and say I’m sorry GOD, I didn’t listen to you.
And I think this tendency is one of if not the most crippling things in a Christian’s life. Because when we mask, or excuse, or hide our sin, we simply delay the repentance process. But CHRIST came so that we could enjoy life to the fullest (John 10). And in order to this, we must walk in the freedom that comes only from forgiveness. But when we don’t admit that we’ve sinned and try to cover it with something other than the blood of CHRIST, we delay the repentance process.
So in our sin, there is a HUGE need for us to call a spade a spade.
Monday, December 8, 2008
doing away the mundane. . .
Last night at Crave we watched a teaching by Francis Chan. Afterwards we had a time of worship, prayer, and just hanging out with GOD. The song that GOD kept leading us to sing is based on Isaiah 6 In the year King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord. He was sitting on a lofty throne, and the train of his robe filled the Temple. . . In a great chorus they sang, "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty! The whole earth is filled with his glory!" The glorious singing shook the Temple to its foundations, and the entire sanctuary was filled with smoke. Then I said, "My destruction is sealed, for I am a sinful man and a member of a sinful race. Yet I have seen the King, the LORD Almighty!. . . "
It is such a powerful picture and I know we have looked at in the past few weeks. It still amazes me and my heart cries out to live in that place where I am so aware of GOD’s majesty that I know I don’t deserve anything that I so often think I have a right to. When I stand in His presence, my puny offerings are never enough, but by the grace and the sacrifice given at the cross I can be in His presence. To live there. . . in His presence. What does that look like?
It brings me back to 1 Thessalonians 5:17 pray continually. When I was a kid, that just baffled me. It seemed so boring. I thought that had to go around kneeling then stopping and folding my hands, then going about my business, and stopping and kneeling. . . you get the picture. It just seemed more like punishment that an honor. I still don’t get it fully, but there are a few things I know.
Prayer is friendship with GOD. It is a 2 way conversation. We share with Him, and he shares with us. So often we get caught up in making sure we let Him know all the details, and like Francis Chan said in the teaching last night “ too often we look more like the prophets of Baal." The prophets of Baal would repeat the same thing over and over again, and even cut themselves (they would inflict pain on themselves to get the attention of their god). How often do we inflict guilt on ourselves or punish ourselves for not being good enough or in order to get Him to hear us.
Not to say we shouldn’t tell GOD what is heavy on our hearts or what we need, He is interested. I mean if He’s gonna take the time to know how many hairs are on my head, and looking at my hairbrush that number changes with every pass of it through my hair. GOD cares about what is going on in my heart and head and what troubles me.
But to be in a place where I am so fully aware that He knows what I’m gonna say before I say it (Psalm 139), to say, “You know Daddy. . . I just. . . And then. . .thank you!!” (Louie Gigglio did an amazing teaching on prayer a few years back called “Prayer Remix” or something like that. When I heard this teaching, GOD totally blew my mind away with how deep prayer and conversations with Him could be.) I mean if I truly am at the point where I realize that He knows my thoughts, then that knowledge takes away all anxieties. I know I don’t have to fret because He IS in control. I can talk to Him out of love, not solely because I am in need or want something. I don’t have to continually try and tweak my prayer to find the “right formula’.
I’m sure many of you have struggled with this. We pray and GOD doesn’t move like we expect, and we think that "if we just. . ." or "if we didn’t. . ." or "if I get louder, or prayer more often. . ."
Opposed to knowing that He is our Father, and resting in the fact He will lead us how to pray (Romans 8).
So in this journey to better understanding prayer, He has taught me that Prayer is a relationship and communication with Him. Prayer is also deeper than we could ever imagine. Think of Elijah in 1 Kings 18. This is when he goes head to head with the prophets of Baal. Then spend all day trying to get their god’s attention, but nothing. Then Elijah simply says "O LORD, God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, prove today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant. Prove that I have done all this at your command. O LORD, answer me! Answer me so these people will know that you, O LORD, are God and that you have brought them back to yourself." And fire came down.
That is beyond our understanding. So deep, so powerful. It’s not about me and my ability to say or do the right thing, but more it is about me humbling myself and submitting to His glory and power. James 5 says that we are not different that Elijah. He was a man just like us. If he could grasp this understanding of the power of prayer and prayed sincere prayers, then we can too. In fact, Elijah did all this before JESUS.
So all this to say. . .
What is prayer?
How do you pray?
What does it mean to pray continually?
Do you sometimes not go to prayer because you feel unworthy?
Why do we pray?
It is such a powerful picture and I know we have looked at in the past few weeks. It still amazes me and my heart cries out to live in that place where I am so aware of GOD’s majesty that I know I don’t deserve anything that I so often think I have a right to. When I stand in His presence, my puny offerings are never enough, but by the grace and the sacrifice given at the cross I can be in His presence. To live there. . . in His presence. What does that look like?
It brings me back to 1 Thessalonians 5:17 pray continually. When I was a kid, that just baffled me. It seemed so boring. I thought that had to go around kneeling then stopping and folding my hands, then going about my business, and stopping and kneeling. . . you get the picture. It just seemed more like punishment that an honor. I still don’t get it fully, but there are a few things I know.
Prayer is friendship with GOD. It is a 2 way conversation. We share with Him, and he shares with us. So often we get caught up in making sure we let Him know all the details, and like Francis Chan said in the teaching last night “ too often we look more like the prophets of Baal." The prophets of Baal would repeat the same thing over and over again, and even cut themselves (they would inflict pain on themselves to get the attention of their god). How often do we inflict guilt on ourselves or punish ourselves for not being good enough or in order to get Him to hear us.
Not to say we shouldn’t tell GOD what is heavy on our hearts or what we need, He is interested. I mean if He’s gonna take the time to know how many hairs are on my head, and looking at my hairbrush that number changes with every pass of it through my hair. GOD cares about what is going on in my heart and head and what troubles me.
But to be in a place where I am so fully aware that He knows what I’m gonna say before I say it (Psalm 139), to say, “You know Daddy. . . I just. . . And then. . .thank you!!” (Louie Gigglio did an amazing teaching on prayer a few years back called “Prayer Remix” or something like that. When I heard this teaching, GOD totally blew my mind away with how deep prayer and conversations with Him could be.) I mean if I truly am at the point where I realize that He knows my thoughts, then that knowledge takes away all anxieties. I know I don’t have to fret because He IS in control. I can talk to Him out of love, not solely because I am in need or want something. I don’t have to continually try and tweak my prayer to find the “right formula’.
I’m sure many of you have struggled with this. We pray and GOD doesn’t move like we expect, and we think that "if we just. . ." or "if we didn’t. . ." or "if I get louder, or prayer more often. . ."
Opposed to knowing that He is our Father, and resting in the fact He will lead us how to pray (Romans 8).
So in this journey to better understanding prayer, He has taught me that Prayer is a relationship and communication with Him. Prayer is also deeper than we could ever imagine. Think of Elijah in 1 Kings 18. This is when he goes head to head with the prophets of Baal. Then spend all day trying to get their god’s attention, but nothing. Then Elijah simply says "O LORD, God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, prove today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant. Prove that I have done all this at your command. O LORD, answer me! Answer me so these people will know that you, O LORD, are God and that you have brought them back to yourself." And fire came down.
That is beyond our understanding. So deep, so powerful. It’s not about me and my ability to say or do the right thing, but more it is about me humbling myself and submitting to His glory and power. James 5 says that we are not different that Elijah. He was a man just like us. If he could grasp this understanding of the power of prayer and prayed sincere prayers, then we can too. In fact, Elijah did all this before JESUS.
So all this to say. . .
What is prayer?
How do you pray?
What does it mean to pray continually?
Do you sometimes not go to prayer because you feel unworthy?
Why do we pray?
Thursday, December 4, 2008
refined telent
I used to not be a big fan of gold. I always had a lot of friends who like it, but not I. And even now, I'm not a fan of shiny gold; I like the antique finished stuff. I know this is boring for guys, but all that to say growing up this idea didn't have much meaning to me because I didn't care about gold.
When I was younger and in church, I heard many teaching on gold. And how like gold ,GOD wants to refine us. And he does so through various methods, one being trials (1 Peter). But unfortunately it didn’t mean much to me when someone said that GOD is refining us like gold because gold held no value for me.
But the process is amazing, and it is another example of how GOD made the physical world to mirror the spiritual. Gold refining for dummies goes as follows. . . there is something that has gold in it but it isn't pure, so they heat up this rock or ore or whatever. And as they keep heating it the gold separates from the rest of the worthless material. The hotter the fire, the more pure and refined the gold.
Isn't that amazing because that is what GOD does for us. All of us can relate to that. We are going through something that is rough, I mean so rough we think we're gonna vomit from the pain and our heart is literally gonna implode. But after, when GOD has gotten us through it, our faith is stronger. And the only way we can truly learn to trust GOD is this process. Going through the hard times and allowing Him to get us through it.
It's like a muscle. The only way to grow a muscle is to stretch it beyond what it was made to do before. And the more weight and repetition added, the stronger the muscle.
So these two ideas go hand in hand. GOD uses the trials of our lives, whether it be a break-up, family problems, loneliness, school, car troubles, or just plain mean people. We have seen GOD use these things time and time again to refine our character and faith as gold.
Tuesday during a conversation with a very wise friend, she said something that stuck out to me and made me ponder. She said that people have unrefined talent and gifts. For example, I have a friend who is an amazing teacher and when I told him that, he said it’s just practice. The older he gets, the more he teaches and the more he learns different tips on teaching the better he gets. His gift and talent is refined.
This also made me think back to when I was younger in GOD. I still had the same gifts as I do now, but I was so immature in them that I didn’t know what to do with them. And since our greatest gifts are also our greatest challenges in our life, I would often, and still do sometimes, hurt people. For example, my bluntness in communicating truth. There have been so many times when I am talking to someone I love and they ask my opinion, but they don’t want to hear it. Instead they would rather me tell them what they want to hear, but because I love them, I’m gonna tell them the truth in love. (I know this isn’t a gift unique to me but very common). But it is a gift nonetheless. A gift that I pray I always use with wisdom because let’s face it; sometimes people aren’t ready for the truth.
But years ago I went around hurting people needlessly. In my immaturity and unrefined gift I didn’t know how to handle things with wisdom. I think of this girl I waited tables with at Waffle House. She wasn’t the hardest of workers. In fact she didn’t really work hard at all. So I and the other ladies had to pick up the slack. It didn’t take much for anyone to see this. But instead of going to GOD for this girl, I just went off on her. My big ole log in my eye wacked her in the face while I was trying to get her speck out. But over the years GOD has, and still is, teaching me to “Go to GOD for my neighbor before I go to my neighbor for GOD”.
He has been refining my gift.
I can say the same for the other gifts he’s given me: my voice, my love of and heart for children, my teaching, my artistic gift. He is refining it.
What gifts and talents do you have that He is trying to refine? This again is a hard question because if you are anything like me, you see a gift and are so anxious to use it because you don’t want it to be wasted, that you cause harm. Instead we must nurture our gifts and let our Father refine them.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
fully dressed?
This morning GOD and I were having a conversation: it was more like the middle of the night. During this time, I believe He showed me a beautiful picture to strive for. He then confirmed it today in staff prayer.
I think we all understand the idea of the proud being humbled. Not only is it a concept that is described over and over in the Bible (Psalm 18:27, Job 22:29, Isaiah 13:11) it is something we see daily in our world. Sometimes it takes on the form of a corporate mogul who ends his reign in a humiliating crash, and a move star who once was on top but ends their life in an overdose on a sidewalk where people just pass him by.
In our own lives, being humbled can look like a teacher calling us out in class and us not knowing the answer cuz in our pride, or laziness or whatever, we didn't do the homework assignment the night before. I know for me it also often looks like complete failure after taking on more responsibilities than I can handle, but in my pride I thought I could.
And it can also just be the rude, arrogant person, getting what's theirs. Or at least that's how we like to define it. Whatever the cause of the humblement, we know that when it is forced upon us, it is never something we enjoy and generally brings about pain.
None of want to be humbled, yet humility is something that we are told to strive for. 2 Chronicles 7:14 Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and heal their land.
That is the beautiful picture GOD was showing to me today: The difference between being humbled and humbling yourself. When we are humbled it isn't pleasant and is a result of some unwise choice, but when we choose to humble ourselves before GOD. . . is there any wiser choice?
Looking back at some of the greats of our faith like David, Moses, Deborah, Esther and Paul; they knew how to humble themselves before the LORD. They had an understanding and a grasp of the awesomeness that is our GOD.
In scripture whenever someone comes face to face with the glory of GOD, they fall down from the full assuredness that they are unworthy to be in His presence. One of my favorite and most breathtaking examples of this is Isaiah 6 1 In the year King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord. He was sitting on a lofty throne, and the train of his robe filled the Temple. 2 Hovering around him were mighty seraphim, each with six wings. With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with the remaining two they flew. 3 In a great chorus they sang, "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty! The whole earth is filled with his glory!" 4 The glorious singing shook the Temple to its foundations, and the entire sanctuary was filled with smoke. 5 Then I said, "My destruction is sealed, for I am a sinful man and a member of a sinful race. Yet I have seen the King, the LORD Almighty!" 6 Then one of the seraphim flew over to the altar, and he picked up a burning coal with a pair of tongs. 7 He touched my lips with it and said, "See, this coal has touched your lips. Now your guilt is removed, and your sins are forgiven." (emphasis added)
Wow, the greatness of GOD is so beyond our comprehension!! In His presence Isaiah was fully away of his inferiority compared to GOD.
But isn't that what happens every time we encounter the presence of GOD??
So the picture GOD gave me is a life lived so fully aware of the presence and majesty of GOD, that humility is chosen daily, hourly, with every decision. And in such a life, there is no need to be humbled because such humility is worn as a garment (as Col 3:12 describes). This is not an easy task, but I believe it only can come from always being away of the majesty of GOD and guarding ourselves against ANYTHING that would try and take our eyes of His beauty and perfection.
Imagine the beauty your life would be if you were so in tune and aware of the presence and greatness of GOD that you choose every day to put on humility because you know that is the only position you can take in light of Him. I'm not there, not by a long shot. But I beleive that through CHRIST my life can look more and more like this everyday.
I think we all understand the idea of the proud being humbled. Not only is it a concept that is described over and over in the Bible (Psalm 18:27, Job 22:29, Isaiah 13:11) it is something we see daily in our world. Sometimes it takes on the form of a corporate mogul who ends his reign in a humiliating crash, and a move star who once was on top but ends their life in an overdose on a sidewalk where people just pass him by.
In our own lives, being humbled can look like a teacher calling us out in class and us not knowing the answer cuz in our pride, or laziness or whatever, we didn't do the homework assignment the night before. I know for me it also often looks like complete failure after taking on more responsibilities than I can handle, but in my pride I thought I could.
And it can also just be the rude, arrogant person, getting what's theirs. Or at least that's how we like to define it. Whatever the cause of the humblement, we know that when it is forced upon us, it is never something we enjoy and generally brings about pain.
None of want to be humbled, yet humility is something that we are told to strive for. 2 Chronicles 7:14 Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and heal their land.
That is the beautiful picture GOD was showing to me today: The difference between being humbled and humbling yourself. When we are humbled it isn't pleasant and is a result of some unwise choice, but when we choose to humble ourselves before GOD. . . is there any wiser choice?
Looking back at some of the greats of our faith like David, Moses, Deborah, Esther and Paul; they knew how to humble themselves before the LORD. They had an understanding and a grasp of the awesomeness that is our GOD.
In scripture whenever someone comes face to face with the glory of GOD, they fall down from the full assuredness that they are unworthy to be in His presence. One of my favorite and most breathtaking examples of this is Isaiah 6 1 In the year King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord. He was sitting on a lofty throne, and the train of his robe filled the Temple. 2 Hovering around him were mighty seraphim, each with six wings. With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with the remaining two they flew. 3 In a great chorus they sang, "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty! The whole earth is filled with his glory!" 4 The glorious singing shook the Temple to its foundations, and the entire sanctuary was filled with smoke. 5 Then I said, "My destruction is sealed, for I am a sinful man and a member of a sinful race. Yet I have seen the King, the LORD Almighty!" 6 Then one of the seraphim flew over to the altar, and he picked up a burning coal with a pair of tongs. 7 He touched my lips with it and said, "See, this coal has touched your lips. Now your guilt is removed, and your sins are forgiven." (emphasis added)
Wow, the greatness of GOD is so beyond our comprehension!! In His presence Isaiah was fully away of his inferiority compared to GOD.
But isn't that what happens every time we encounter the presence of GOD??
So the picture GOD gave me is a life lived so fully aware of the presence and majesty of GOD, that humility is chosen daily, hourly, with every decision. And in such a life, there is no need to be humbled because such humility is worn as a garment (as Col 3:12 describes). This is not an easy task, but I believe it only can come from always being away of the majesty of GOD and guarding ourselves against ANYTHING that would try and take our eyes of His beauty and perfection.
Imagine the beauty your life would be if you were so in tune and aware of the presence and greatness of GOD that you choose every day to put on humility because you know that is the only position you can take in light of Him. I'm not there, not by a long shot. But I beleive that through CHRIST my life can look more and more like this everyday.
Monday, December 1, 2008
A safe place
Last night's message at Crave was amazing. Jeremy did an awesome job speaking about cities of refuge. There were a lot of things that stuck out to me and I really am thankful to be a part of a group where broken people can come.
I left with the overwhelming desire to make sure that everyone in my life sees me and my home as a city of refuge.
A couple years ago Andy Stanley did a series and one of the questions he left us to think about is "Am I a safe place?" Meaning can the people closest to me come to me and be open with their hearts knowing they can trust me? A very close friend goes to his church so she was hearing the same series and I loved how that theme was reflected in our friendship and conversations. We realized, esp since we are such totally different people, that for us to be a safe place it must be something we actively pursue.
And sadly, I think we are more aware of our unsafe places. We have all felt the sting of betrayal, have been on the harsh end of gossip, have been told the lie that we're just not enough or we're simply too much. Whatever the case may be, we have all felt the pain of learning that someone or a group of someones wasn't a safe place.
And it is so important for us to identify our safe places. Last week in Captivate we were looking at Hosea and how GOD so beautifully lays our criteria for the type of leadership we should follow. One of the things that jumped out at me is how whoever we follow must be worthy of our trust. Too often people seek advice from unworthy mouths. We look to people who tell us what we want to hear, or who will wallow in out self pity with us, or those who time after time react with a cruelness that in unbelievable, but we so desperately seek their approval, we keep coming back.
But as time goes by we learn the art and beauty of guarding our heart (Proverbs 4:23), not building a wall around it. But protecting and making sure that we are careful who we trust with it.
But can people trust their hearts to us. . .
Are you a safe place. . .
It is a hard question to ask because in doing so, we must look deep into our own hearts. We must allow GOD to show us the crap that we have buried under more crap. And we must allow Him to put His healing hand on the wounds that we have long ignored, hoping they would disappear. But in this process we let go of our anger, jealousy, pride, and every other maliciousness we hold on to.
Too often our hearts have been wounded in the past. Really wounded and the wounds are never tended to. Instead they fester. They become infected and fill with puss. They hurt so badly because they are swollen and bloated with infection that has gone without attention for years. We hope that it will heal itself. But just like a wound in our flesh, these hurts must be tended to. They must be cleaned out. Many times they must be lanced to have the infection drained.
Nasty I know. I hope it makes you a little nauseous, because that's how serious it is. We would never let our wounded leg go without medical attention, so we must learn not to let our hearts go without the healing and medicine it needs.
Then, we can be a safe place. We can see the ones we love who are utterly broken and not loose patience with them. We can identify the scars and unchecked infections in the hearts of the ones we love because we have had similar wounds. We have empathy for those around us and appreciate and understand the value of a safe place.
In thinking about this Luke 6:42 How can you think of saying, 'Friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,' when you can't see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye. becomes so much more precious to me. Not only do I have to tend to my own wound first, remove the log from my eye, I must also be extremely close to the one I am hoping to be used by GOD to heal. In order to see a speck we must be close. Very close. A safe place.
This is how through CHRIST we can encourage one another while at the same time holding each other accountable.
I left with the overwhelming desire to make sure that everyone in my life sees me and my home as a city of refuge.
A couple years ago Andy Stanley did a series and one of the questions he left us to think about is "Am I a safe place?" Meaning can the people closest to me come to me and be open with their hearts knowing they can trust me? A very close friend goes to his church so she was hearing the same series and I loved how that theme was reflected in our friendship and conversations. We realized, esp since we are such totally different people, that for us to be a safe place it must be something we actively pursue.
And sadly, I think we are more aware of our unsafe places. We have all felt the sting of betrayal, have been on the harsh end of gossip, have been told the lie that we're just not enough or we're simply too much. Whatever the case may be, we have all felt the pain of learning that someone or a group of someones wasn't a safe place.
And it is so important for us to identify our safe places. Last week in Captivate we were looking at Hosea and how GOD so beautifully lays our criteria for the type of leadership we should follow. One of the things that jumped out at me is how whoever we follow must be worthy of our trust. Too often people seek advice from unworthy mouths. We look to people who tell us what we want to hear, or who will wallow in out self pity with us, or those who time after time react with a cruelness that in unbelievable, but we so desperately seek their approval, we keep coming back.
But as time goes by we learn the art and beauty of guarding our heart (Proverbs 4:23), not building a wall around it. But protecting and making sure that we are careful who we trust with it.
But can people trust their hearts to us. . .
Are you a safe place. . .
It is a hard question to ask because in doing so, we must look deep into our own hearts. We must allow GOD to show us the crap that we have buried under more crap. And we must allow Him to put His healing hand on the wounds that we have long ignored, hoping they would disappear. But in this process we let go of our anger, jealousy, pride, and every other maliciousness we hold on to.
Too often our hearts have been wounded in the past. Really wounded and the wounds are never tended to. Instead they fester. They become infected and fill with puss. They hurt so badly because they are swollen and bloated with infection that has gone without attention for years. We hope that it will heal itself. But just like a wound in our flesh, these hurts must be tended to. They must be cleaned out. Many times they must be lanced to have the infection drained.
Nasty I know. I hope it makes you a little nauseous, because that's how serious it is. We would never let our wounded leg go without medical attention, so we must learn not to let our hearts go without the healing and medicine it needs.
Then, we can be a safe place. We can see the ones we love who are utterly broken and not loose patience with them. We can identify the scars and unchecked infections in the hearts of the ones we love because we have had similar wounds. We have empathy for those around us and appreciate and understand the value of a safe place.
In thinking about this Luke 6:42 How can you think of saying, 'Friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,' when you can't see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye. becomes so much more precious to me. Not only do I have to tend to my own wound first, remove the log from my eye, I must also be extremely close to the one I am hoping to be used by GOD to heal. In order to see a speck we must be close. Very close. A safe place.
This is how through CHRIST we can encourage one another while at the same time holding each other accountable.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
When GOD sends you penguins
So this morning I woke up and felt pretty beaten and defeated. I was so aware of my humanness and the whole "your righteousness is like a filthy rag" thing was obvious. I had screwed up again and the contamination was trying to take hold of me.
Then the most amazing gift came in a text I had gotten the morning before. It was from the people whose house I am watching while they are overseas. The text wished me a happy Thanksgiving, and told me where some Christmas decorations were. That gave me a smile cuz it being my first Christmas in the States in my own home, I want to fully embrace the whole being able to have lights and glitz everywhere.
So this morning before heading out for Thanksgiving festivities, I looked in the closet where the decoration are stored, and what did I find??? 2 boxes full of nutcrackers!! Now that may seem like much to a normal person, but for me, I was giddy all morning. I love The Nutcracker. To me it is one of the most magical and enchanting stories ever. And it speaks so much to me of how GOD loves us and protects us, but that is another thought for another day.
The fact it is, had I gone in the closet yesterday and discovered the box, I would have been happy. But since it happened this morning, when I felt so beaten by the enemy, those little wooden statues had me floating. An hour before I had been telling GOD how inadequate I felt, and how I wondered why He put up with me and loved me. And while His conviction fell and He showed me an area I need to guard my heart and mouth more in, He then gave me such an amazing present. He gave me my penguins.
Now you may not know what I mean by that. Years ago I had to opportunity to hear Luci Swindoll speak and she shared about her adventure to Antarctica. She is a photographer and had asked GOD to send a whale her way so she could photograph it. And she just new she was gonna see one. Toward the end of her trip, she was on the boat and wondering why she hadn't seen a whale. She was so sad because she wanted to see this beautiful, epic creature of GOD. And (as I remember the story) about that time she noticed a couple penguins on a glacier. Then more and more. She said there were hundreds of them, playing and performing. It's as if they had been waiting for her to come and were posing for her. How fun and amazing that must have been!! What a sight to see!!
GOD told her she was so busy looking for the whale, that she almost missed the penguins.
Moral of the story, it is in the beautiful small details of life that GOD so often blows us away. Like me and the 2 boxes of nutcrackers. I felt GOD's love and delight in me (Psalm 45:11) so strong this morning. On a day that started out felling icky and defeated, GOD sent me some penguins in the form of nutcrackers, to set the stage for one of those rare perfect days. Which this Thanksgiving has been: One of those perfect days we wish we could freeze time for and live in.
Do you sometimes miss the penguins cuz you're waiting for the whale?
Then the most amazing gift came in a text I had gotten the morning before. It was from the people whose house I am watching while they are overseas. The text wished me a happy Thanksgiving, and told me where some Christmas decorations were. That gave me a smile cuz it being my first Christmas in the States in my own home, I want to fully embrace the whole being able to have lights and glitz everywhere.
So this morning before heading out for Thanksgiving festivities, I looked in the closet where the decoration are stored, and what did I find??? 2 boxes full of nutcrackers!! Now that may seem like much to a normal person, but for me, I was giddy all morning. I love The Nutcracker. To me it is one of the most magical and enchanting stories ever. And it speaks so much to me of how GOD loves us and protects us, but that is another thought for another day.
The fact it is, had I gone in the closet yesterday and discovered the box, I would have been happy. But since it happened this morning, when I felt so beaten by the enemy, those little wooden statues had me floating. An hour before I had been telling GOD how inadequate I felt, and how I wondered why He put up with me and loved me. And while His conviction fell and He showed me an area I need to guard my heart and mouth more in, He then gave me such an amazing present. He gave me my penguins.
Now you may not know what I mean by that. Years ago I had to opportunity to hear Luci Swindoll speak and she shared about her adventure to Antarctica. She is a photographer and had asked GOD to send a whale her way so she could photograph it. And she just new she was gonna see one. Toward the end of her trip, she was on the boat and wondering why she hadn't seen a whale. She was so sad because she wanted to see this beautiful, epic creature of GOD. And (as I remember the story) about that time she noticed a couple penguins on a glacier. Then more and more. She said there were hundreds of them, playing and performing. It's as if they had been waiting for her to come and were posing for her. How fun and amazing that must have been!! What a sight to see!!
GOD told her she was so busy looking for the whale, that she almost missed the penguins.
Moral of the story, it is in the beautiful small details of life that GOD so often blows us away. Like me and the 2 boxes of nutcrackers. I felt GOD's love and delight in me (Psalm 45:11) so strong this morning. On a day that started out felling icky and defeated, GOD sent me some penguins in the form of nutcrackers, to set the stage for one of those rare perfect days. Which this Thanksgiving has been: One of those perfect days we wish we could freeze time for and live in.
Do you sometimes miss the penguins cuz you're waiting for the whale?
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
A Full Life?
This morning I was reading John 10:10 The thief's purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give life in all its fullness.
This is a verse most of us have heard many times, and personally it has become a vital part of my journey with GOD. It is so simple, and a small part of a whole concept. But in this verse we see that we are under attack. That we must battle for our hearts because the enemy is after us.
I don't mean we go around scared and fearful. But we must be aware our each of our thoughts captive (2 Corinthians 10:5) and learn to think as GOD wants us to by daily renewing our minds (Romans 12:2).
But the thing that stuck out to me this morning was the second part. . . "[JESUS's] purpose is to give life to its fullest"
We all have preconceived notions of what life to its fullest means. Especially in America, and especially in the American church. When we think of life to its fullest we think of success in the workplace, a family that actually wants to be together during the holidays, and GOD just making everything go smoothly. I know I buy into lie more often that I should, and am guessing I'm not the only one. Then this morning GOD reminded me that life to its fullest isn't going to look like I think it will.
Some aspects of it will. I am so blessed to have my family and be around the dinner table tomorrow celebrating our lives together and everything GOD has done. And I am doubly blessed because I will then celebrate with the family of my best friend of 20 years (who is more like a sister than a friend). In those areas life to its fullest looks like I think it should.
But then there are other areas where life to its fullest looks more like torture. We live in a fallen world, and GOD has allowed me to play a role and work on His behalf in some very important people who have a special place in my heart. And often life to its fullest is holding them as they cry over tragedy. Doesn't sound like it at first, but that is what JESUS does for us. And he has called us t be His hands in this world. So when I allow my hands to become His hands and reach out to show love and mercy then I am totally living life to its fullest.
There are so many other ways that at first sight don't seem like a full life, but when we look at the through the Light of Scripture, we see that even in the pain and tragedy of this world, we can live in the gift JESUS gave us of life to its fullest.
This is a verse most of us have heard many times, and personally it has become a vital part of my journey with GOD. It is so simple, and a small part of a whole concept. But in this verse we see that we are under attack. That we must battle for our hearts because the enemy is after us.
I don't mean we go around scared and fearful. But we must be aware our each of our thoughts captive (2 Corinthians 10:5) and learn to think as GOD wants us to by daily renewing our minds (Romans 12:2).
But the thing that stuck out to me this morning was the second part. . . "[JESUS's] purpose is to give life to its fullest"
We all have preconceived notions of what life to its fullest means. Especially in America, and especially in the American church. When we think of life to its fullest we think of success in the workplace, a family that actually wants to be together during the holidays, and GOD just making everything go smoothly. I know I buy into lie more often that I should, and am guessing I'm not the only one. Then this morning GOD reminded me that life to its fullest isn't going to look like I think it will.
Some aspects of it will. I am so blessed to have my family and be around the dinner table tomorrow celebrating our lives together and everything GOD has done. And I am doubly blessed because I will then celebrate with the family of my best friend of 20 years (who is more like a sister than a friend). In those areas life to its fullest looks like I think it should.
But then there are other areas where life to its fullest looks more like torture. We live in a fallen world, and GOD has allowed me to play a role and work on His behalf in some very important people who have a special place in my heart. And often life to its fullest is holding them as they cry over tragedy. Doesn't sound like it at first, but that is what JESUS does for us. And he has called us t be His hands in this world. So when I allow my hands to become His hands and reach out to show love and mercy then I am totally living life to its fullest.
There are so many other ways that at first sight don't seem like a full life, but when we look at the through the Light of Scripture, we see that even in the pain and tragedy of this world, we can live in the gift JESUS gave us of life to its fullest.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Putting Up Pretenses
Anyone who has known me for a while knows that I am not a fan of having my picture taken, and candids rarely turn out like I hope. Why? I think a lot of it has to do with the stupid things I do and the weird faces I make. And while they are fun in the moment I don't really enjoy looking at them later. So from time to time when people tag me in a photo on facebook, I am thankful that I can untag myself. Why?
Because I don't like the image that is portrayed of me.
Everyone does this in one way or another. For me the most obvious way is the fact I don't like most pictres of me, and I know that there are a lot of women out there who can relate to this. But there are so many other ways we put up pretenses. I remember back when I walked the fence between a life after GOD and a life after the world. Everytime I stepped in the church building I was puttng up a front of some kind. I would never let my guard completely down because I knew if someone looked too closely, they would see a hypocrite who has made a home in the world.
Some people put up pretenses in relationships. I know that this is a temptation for many when it comes to dating. In fact, most magazines advize this. Don't be yourself all at once, or they may not like you. We are told my Cosmo and GQ that we must portray a certain image to get them hooked on us, then slowly reveal the real us to them.
And while that is a sad state to live in, it's even more sad when we are that way with GOD.
This is what the Pharisees of JESUS day did. (Matthew 6 has several examples of this) Paul referred to them as white washed tombs (Acts 23). They looked pretty on the outside, but on the inside they reaked with the stinch of death.
But more often than not, our pretense or false appearance, is more subtle when we come before GOD. Instead of crying out to Him and letting Him know the pain we are in because our hearts are broken, we say a censored prayed that we think He would rather hear. But He already knows what's in our hearts, why do we try and hide it?
I'm not saying that we live a life of disrespect, it's quite the contrary that I'm suggesting. I think that GOD longs for a realness in His people. Look at Davd and Moses: David is described as a man after GOD's own heart (Acts 13), and Moses is referred to as His friend (Exudus 33). And these men were real before GOD; there was no pretense.
Look at what Moses pray when He was at His witts end with the Isrealites in Numbers 11:11-15. . . And Moses said to the LORD, "Why are you treating me, your servant, so miserably? What did I do to deserve the burden of a people like this? Are they my children? Am I their father? Is that why you have told me to carry them in my arms – like a nurse carries a baby – to the land you swore to give their ancestors? Where am I supposed to get meat for all these people? They keep complaining and saying, 'Give us meat!' I can't carry all these people by myself! The load is far too heavy! I'd rather you killed me than treat me like this. Please spare me this misery!"
This is the man who GOD was speaking to when He said in Exudus 33:17 ". . . you are my friend."
And David wrote many Psalms crying out to GOD (Psalm 10 &13 just to name a couple).
But the beauty I see in these prayers is that they knew in their heartache that they could cry out to GOD. Then once their hearts were on the mend they would see how GOD was working and could rest in the arms of their Father. In the next chapter of Numbers, Moses is seen prayig for the wellfare of his brother and sister. Then he goes on to lead the people in the desert for 40 years.
He didn't leave it at the blowup. Instead Moses shared his heart with GOD and let GOD lead him through his pain. No pretense, just realness.
Because I don't like the image that is portrayed of me.
Everyone does this in one way or another. For me the most obvious way is the fact I don't like most pictres of me, and I know that there are a lot of women out there who can relate to this. But there are so many other ways we put up pretenses. I remember back when I walked the fence between a life after GOD and a life after the world. Everytime I stepped in the church building I was puttng up a front of some kind. I would never let my guard completely down because I knew if someone looked too closely, they would see a hypocrite who has made a home in the world.
Some people put up pretenses in relationships. I know that this is a temptation for many when it comes to dating. In fact, most magazines advize this. Don't be yourself all at once, or they may not like you. We are told my Cosmo and GQ that we must portray a certain image to get them hooked on us, then slowly reveal the real us to them.
And while that is a sad state to live in, it's even more sad when we are that way with GOD.
This is what the Pharisees of JESUS day did. (Matthew 6 has several examples of this) Paul referred to them as white washed tombs (Acts 23). They looked pretty on the outside, but on the inside they reaked with the stinch of death.
But more often than not, our pretense or false appearance, is more subtle when we come before GOD. Instead of crying out to Him and letting Him know the pain we are in because our hearts are broken, we say a censored prayed that we think He would rather hear. But He already knows what's in our hearts, why do we try and hide it?
I'm not saying that we live a life of disrespect, it's quite the contrary that I'm suggesting. I think that GOD longs for a realness in His people. Look at Davd and Moses: David is described as a man after GOD's own heart (Acts 13), and Moses is referred to as His friend (Exudus 33). And these men were real before GOD; there was no pretense.
Look at what Moses pray when He was at His witts end with the Isrealites in Numbers 11:11-15. . . And Moses said to the LORD, "Why are you treating me, your servant, so miserably? What did I do to deserve the burden of a people like this? Are they my children? Am I their father? Is that why you have told me to carry them in my arms – like a nurse carries a baby – to the land you swore to give their ancestors? Where am I supposed to get meat for all these people? They keep complaining and saying, 'Give us meat!' I can't carry all these people by myself! The load is far too heavy! I'd rather you killed me than treat me like this. Please spare me this misery!"
This is the man who GOD was speaking to when He said in Exudus 33:17 ". . . you are my friend."
And David wrote many Psalms crying out to GOD (Psalm 10 &13 just to name a couple).
But the beauty I see in these prayers is that they knew in their heartache that they could cry out to GOD. Then once their hearts were on the mend they would see how GOD was working and could rest in the arms of their Father. In the next chapter of Numbers, Moses is seen prayig for the wellfare of his brother and sister. Then he goes on to lead the people in the desert for 40 years.
He didn't leave it at the blowup. Instead Moses shared his heart with GOD and let GOD lead him through his pain. No pretense, just realness.
Monday, November 24, 2008
When GOD walls us in
Hosea 2:6-7 "But I will fence her in with thornbushes. I will block the road to make her lose her way. When she runs after her lovers, she won't be able to catch up with them. She will search for them but not find them. Then she will think, 'I might as well return to my husband because I was better off with him than I am now.'
Have you ever felt this was? This is a passage from one of my favorite books. In fact, in the girl's small group we are going through the book of Hosea, and it is amazing!! Each week GOD blows us away with how much He loves us by speaking through this book.
If you've never read it, I would challenge you to take a look at it. It is in the Old Testament right after Daniel.
This particular passage that is so beautiful to me. Now it may not seem like it at first, but when it is in the whole context of the book, you see the process that GOD is taking Gomer through. He is also taking us through it. So often we find our self n this cycle.We are close to GOD, but then slowly we let something get in the way. We hear Him calling to us and wooing us to come back to Him, but we don't answer. And the more we resist him, the harder it is to hear.
Until we find a place where our hearts are so surrounded by callouses that we no longer hear Him. Then comes the time when He blocks our paths. Where He leads us into the desert as verse 3 says of this same chapter. And this is such a loving attribute of GOD that we forget about. And when we are in the midst of it, it doesn't feel very loving. In fact, often we think that He is punishing us out of anger or disappointment. But He is getting us to a place where we will have to look up.
A practical way this may happen is with a friendship. This is an easy one we have all had to deal with. We meet someone, I'm not necessarily talking about someone of the opposite sex. But we meet this person, and we have a blast with them. But after a few days we realize that they may not be the best influence on us. In fact they struggle with the same things we do. And while at first we say that we will help each other stay strong, inevitably they become an enabler. Instead of talking about how good GOD is, being around this person helps us be comfortable in our pride, rebellion, apathy, gossip, lust. . . Whatever the case is, we find ourselves in a place where we can't hear GOD as well, or He feels so stinkin far from us we wonder if He is there or even loves us.
But then something happens. It s usually very tragic and full of drama. We wonder why GOD is allowing this to happen and scorn the very thing GOD is doing for us. Then after a while in the desert and surrounded by the thorn bushes, we hear Him wooing us and calling to us. And that is where the healing happens.
And it doesn't just happen in relationship. It could be your school, your job, how you're spending your money or your time. There are as many possibilities as there are people for the things that we are tempted to and do put in front of GOD.
So my question is, when was the last time GOD walled you in, did you realize what was happening? Are you walled in now and desperately fighting Him? Are you in the place where you are slowing hearing less and less of GOD? We all do this.
I heard something once: "true education takes away anxiety". That so applies here. The more we are educated in this, the easier we see it. When the time comes where we feel we are farther from our father than we would like, we can look at it and ask, "what's going on. DADDY, search my heart and show me what needs to change."
It is such a beautiful thing when GOD walls us in.
Have you ever felt this was? This is a passage from one of my favorite books. In fact, in the girl's small group we are going through the book of Hosea, and it is amazing!! Each week GOD blows us away with how much He loves us by speaking through this book.
If you've never read it, I would challenge you to take a look at it. It is in the Old Testament right after Daniel.
This particular passage that is so beautiful to me. Now it may not seem like it at first, but when it is in the whole context of the book, you see the process that GOD is taking Gomer through. He is also taking us through it. So often we find our self n this cycle.We are close to GOD, but then slowly we let something get in the way. We hear Him calling to us and wooing us to come back to Him, but we don't answer. And the more we resist him, the harder it is to hear.
Until we find a place where our hearts are so surrounded by callouses that we no longer hear Him. Then comes the time when He blocks our paths. Where He leads us into the desert as verse 3 says of this same chapter. And this is such a loving attribute of GOD that we forget about. And when we are in the midst of it, it doesn't feel very loving. In fact, often we think that He is punishing us out of anger or disappointment. But He is getting us to a place where we will have to look up.
A practical way this may happen is with a friendship. This is an easy one we have all had to deal with. We meet someone, I'm not necessarily talking about someone of the opposite sex. But we meet this person, and we have a blast with them. But after a few days we realize that they may not be the best influence on us. In fact they struggle with the same things we do. And while at first we say that we will help each other stay strong, inevitably they become an enabler. Instead of talking about how good GOD is, being around this person helps us be comfortable in our pride, rebellion, apathy, gossip, lust. . . Whatever the case is, we find ourselves in a place where we can't hear GOD as well, or He feels so stinkin far from us we wonder if He is there or even loves us.
But then something happens. It s usually very tragic and full of drama. We wonder why GOD is allowing this to happen and scorn the very thing GOD is doing for us. Then after a while in the desert and surrounded by the thorn bushes, we hear Him wooing us and calling to us. And that is where the healing happens.
And it doesn't just happen in relationship. It could be your school, your job, how you're spending your money or your time. There are as many possibilities as there are people for the things that we are tempted to and do put in front of GOD.
So my question is, when was the last time GOD walled you in, did you realize what was happening? Are you walled in now and desperately fighting Him? Are you in the place where you are slowing hearing less and less of GOD? We all do this.
I heard something once: "true education takes away anxiety". That so applies here. The more we are educated in this, the easier we see it. When the time comes where we feel we are farther from our father than we would like, we can look at it and ask, "what's going on. DADDY, search my heart and show me what needs to change."
It is such a beautiful thing when GOD walls us in.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Am I gonna miss this?
Have you ever heard the song by trace Adkins "You' re Gonna Miss This"?. . .
She was staring out the window of their SUV complaining, saying "I can't wait to turn 18". She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules". Momma put the car in park out there in front of the school. Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"
You're gonna miss this. You're gonna want this back. You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast. These are some good times. So take a good look around. You may not know it now. But you're gonna miss this
There are more verses, but you get the gist. I love this song and tear up every time I hear it. GOD spoke to me earlier in the year so powerfully through this song. So much of my life I have spent looking forward and wanting; as opposed to being content and living in the day.
When I was in college, I dreamed of graduation. When I was nannying before I went to Romania, my focus was the mission field. When I was overseas, my heart ached for home. And then when I got home, I started dreaming of where I will go next.
I hasn't been until the last year that I have really started to learn to be content. Not to say that I don't strive for progress, but until it happens, I am going to enjoy each day. I thank GOD for the place I'm in, which sounds simple, but I think too often so many of us are in such a hurry for the next thing.
The phrase "be an unanxious presence" comes to mind. We all know these people. Or rather, it is obvious and we notice when we are around the opposite. When we are surrounded by discontentment and anxiousness, we too tend to be anxious and discontent or unable to settle. But the fact is we are called to be unanxious and content (Philippians 4:6), which sounds so easy, but is a very hard discipline to learn.
Slowly GOD has been showing me through this song, the importance of realizing that every day is part of a stage of life that one day I will no longer be in, and I need to enjoy it and treasure it as such.
Do you realize that one day you will miss where you are right now? Does that change how you will love today?
She was staring out the window of their SUV complaining, saying "I can't wait to turn 18". She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules". Momma put the car in park out there in front of the school. Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"
You're gonna miss this. You're gonna want this back. You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast. These are some good times. So take a good look around. You may not know it now. But you're gonna miss this
There are more verses, but you get the gist. I love this song and tear up every time I hear it. GOD spoke to me earlier in the year so powerfully through this song. So much of my life I have spent looking forward and wanting; as opposed to being content and living in the day.
When I was in college, I dreamed of graduation. When I was nannying before I went to Romania, my focus was the mission field. When I was overseas, my heart ached for home. And then when I got home, I started dreaming of where I will go next.
I hasn't been until the last year that I have really started to learn to be content. Not to say that I don't strive for progress, but until it happens, I am going to enjoy each day. I thank GOD for the place I'm in, which sounds simple, but I think too often so many of us are in such a hurry for the next thing.
The phrase "be an unanxious presence" comes to mind. We all know these people. Or rather, it is obvious and we notice when we are around the opposite. When we are surrounded by discontentment and anxiousness, we too tend to be anxious and discontent or unable to settle. But the fact is we are called to be unanxious and content (Philippians 4:6), which sounds so easy, but is a very hard discipline to learn.
Slowly GOD has been showing me through this song, the importance of realizing that every day is part of a stage of life that one day I will no longer be in, and I need to enjoy it and treasure it as such.
Do you realize that one day you will miss where you are right now? Does that change how you will love today?
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Where are you standing
Today I heard an amazing teaching by Bernadette. I think many of you know her. She is an amazing woman and a good friend of mine. So the following wisdom is all because of her faithfulness to hear from GOD.
Think back to science class and the rotation of the planets. The earth is continually rotating around the sun and also on its axis, so throughout the days and different seasons we feel different degrees of its heat and light. But the sun never moves, is continually in the same place.
But from our view on earth it is easy to see why ancient astronomers thought the sun revolved around the earth. But the fact is the sun never moves. It is constant and steady.
This can also be said of our relationships with GOD and how intensely we feel the heat of His presence, passion and calling. When we are standing directly under Him, we can feel Him most intensely. We all have experienced this. Days when we are constantly aware of His being with us, days when we are in His Word, and surrounding ourselves with His praise. It is easy in those days to feel the direct heat of His power. But on the days when we are caught up in the business of life and forget He is always with us, wanting to speak to us, we are not in the direct path of His light. The heat is less intense and harder to recognize. Then come the times when we remove ourselves completely from His heat. This is not to say He isn’t involved or He can't find us, but just like Adam in the garden hid from GOD (Genesis 3:9), we too hide behind our fig leaves. Some of the leaves come in the form of busyness, apathy, rebellion, pride, and the list can go on and on. But whatever we are hiding behind, we are hiding nonetheless. And even though GOD is calling out to us like He did to Adam and Eve, we must make the decision to come out of hiding.
Even when we are hiding from the Son. We aren't hidden; He knows where we are. We just don't feel Him, His Passion, His love, and we certainly can't see the direction He is leading us in.
In addition to not feeling the intensity of the heat of the sun, when we are not standing directly under the it, our shadows seem bigger and more daunting that they are. Again, back to science class. What does a shadow look like when you are directly under the light source? It is an exact duplicate of you. The shadow of your feet and hands are the same as the original. But what happens when you move away from the light source? The shadow gets bigger and more distorted. You move too far from the light and the shadow resembles a disfigured monster rather than a human. Isn’t that also the case for our trials, and all the crap we face in this world?? When we are in the direct communion with the Son, we see the problems for what they are and we can better trust GOD.
Too often though we find ourselves moving away from the light instead of leaning into it. The shadow grows while we feel GOD less and less.
It is our choice to daily, hourly, sometimes minutely make sure we are directly under the light of the Son so our problems are seen as they really are and so we can know we are standing in the direct path of the light.
John 12:46 I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the darkness. (NLT)
Think back to science class and the rotation of the planets. The earth is continually rotating around the sun and also on its axis, so throughout the days and different seasons we feel different degrees of its heat and light. But the sun never moves, is continually in the same place.
But from our view on earth it is easy to see why ancient astronomers thought the sun revolved around the earth. But the fact is the sun never moves. It is constant and steady.
This can also be said of our relationships with GOD and how intensely we feel the heat of His presence, passion and calling. When we are standing directly under Him, we can feel Him most intensely. We all have experienced this. Days when we are constantly aware of His being with us, days when we are in His Word, and surrounding ourselves with His praise. It is easy in those days to feel the direct heat of His power. But on the days when we are caught up in the business of life and forget He is always with us, wanting to speak to us, we are not in the direct path of His light. The heat is less intense and harder to recognize. Then come the times when we remove ourselves completely from His heat. This is not to say He isn’t involved or He can't find us, but just like Adam in the garden hid from GOD (Genesis 3:9), we too hide behind our fig leaves. Some of the leaves come in the form of busyness, apathy, rebellion, pride, and the list can go on and on. But whatever we are hiding behind, we are hiding nonetheless. And even though GOD is calling out to us like He did to Adam and Eve, we must make the decision to come out of hiding.
Even when we are hiding from the Son. We aren't hidden; He knows where we are. We just don't feel Him, His Passion, His love, and we certainly can't see the direction He is leading us in.
In addition to not feeling the intensity of the heat of the sun, when we are not standing directly under the it, our shadows seem bigger and more daunting that they are. Again, back to science class. What does a shadow look like when you are directly under the light source? It is an exact duplicate of you. The shadow of your feet and hands are the same as the original. But what happens when you move away from the light source? The shadow gets bigger and more distorted. You move too far from the light and the shadow resembles a disfigured monster rather than a human. Isn’t that also the case for our trials, and all the crap we face in this world?? When we are in the direct communion with the Son, we see the problems for what they are and we can better trust GOD.
Too often though we find ourselves moving away from the light instead of leaning into it. The shadow grows while we feel GOD less and less.
It is our choice to daily, hourly, sometimes minutely make sure we are directly under the light of the Son so our problems are seen as they really are and so we can know we are standing in the direct path of the light.
John 12:46 I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the darkness. (NLT)
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Fighting for the heart. . .
A couple weeks ago I had the opportunity to share a story at Crave about Robert the Bruce. Most of us recognize his name as the man who betrayed William Wallace in Braveheart. Robert the Bruce later led Scotland in it's freedom. While he was on his deathbed he asked for his heart to go with his men in battle. After he died, Robert the Bruce's heart was embalmed and one of his closest friends carried it around his neck in battle.
It sounds gross, but it speaks beautifully the dedication of his men. And as the story goes, the man who carried the heart around his neck was engaged in battle and knew he wasn't going to make it, he grabbed the heart from around his neck and threw in into mass of men engaged in combat and yelled to his men "fight for the heart of your king."
When I shared this story it was in reference to how GOD had opened my eyes to the fact I was becoming a passionless person who so easily fits into a mold. I had almost forgotten the battle that we are engaged in and how He has called us to a life of a barbaric passion for Him.
Then this morning I was reading Isaiah 45:2 I will go before you and level the mountains, I will break in pieces the doors of bronze and cut through the bars of iron. And I was reminded of how many of our hearts are walled in and guarded. I had actually read the day before a description of our hearts being prisoners of fear and past pain, locked away behind gates of bronze and bars of iron.
And all of a sudden the phrase "fight for the heart of your king entered my mind". Then "I heard "Fight for the heart of Your children" and I realized that is a battle cry of JESUS . Scripture over and over again tells how JESUS came so we may be free (Isaiah 61 is just one example). Then I thought of Revelation 19:11-16 Then I saw heaven opened, and a white horse was standing there. And the one sitting on the horse was named Faithful and True. For he judges fairly and then goes to war. His eyes were bright like flames of fire, and on his head were many crowns. A name was written on him, and only he knew what it meant. He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and his title was the Word of God. The armies of heaven, dressed in pure white linen, followed him on white horses. From his mouth came a sharp sword, and with it he struck down the nations. He ruled them with an iron rod, and he trod the winepress of the fierce wrath of almighty God. On his robe and thigh was written this title: King of kings and Lord of lords.
Wow, what a picture that paints of our GOD! Too often when we think of JESUS as someone who is wimpy, the pale, skinny figurine with him holding the lamb. And while He is gentle, He is only so because He chooses to be. We serve a GOD who loves us and endured the cross so we may be in relationship with Him and may grow to become everything He created us to be.
When all the crap of life is staring you down, daring you to make a move yet trying to hold you paralyzed. Or your lying your head on your pillow feeling completely overwhelmed and wondering if GOD hears you or fear you can't hear Him. . . Just remember He is a strong warrior (Revelation 19), He has called you His child (Romans 8:15), and He is working in your situation whether you see it or not (Romans 8:28).
He fights for the hearts of His children
It sounds gross, but it speaks beautifully the dedication of his men. And as the story goes, the man who carried the heart around his neck was engaged in battle and knew he wasn't going to make it, he grabbed the heart from around his neck and threw in into mass of men engaged in combat and yelled to his men "fight for the heart of your king."
When I shared this story it was in reference to how GOD had opened my eyes to the fact I was becoming a passionless person who so easily fits into a mold. I had almost forgotten the battle that we are engaged in and how He has called us to a life of a barbaric passion for Him.
Then this morning I was reading Isaiah 45:2 I will go before you and level the mountains, I will break in pieces the doors of bronze and cut through the bars of iron. And I was reminded of how many of our hearts are walled in and guarded. I had actually read the day before a description of our hearts being prisoners of fear and past pain, locked away behind gates of bronze and bars of iron.
And all of a sudden the phrase "fight for the heart of your king entered my mind". Then "I heard "Fight for the heart of Your children" and I realized that is a battle cry of JESUS . Scripture over and over again tells how JESUS came so we may be free (Isaiah 61 is just one example). Then I thought of Revelation 19:11-16 Then I saw heaven opened, and a white horse was standing there. And the one sitting on the horse was named Faithful and True. For he judges fairly and then goes to war. His eyes were bright like flames of fire, and on his head were many crowns. A name was written on him, and only he knew what it meant. He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and his title was the Word of God. The armies of heaven, dressed in pure white linen, followed him on white horses. From his mouth came a sharp sword, and with it he struck down the nations. He ruled them with an iron rod, and he trod the winepress of the fierce wrath of almighty God. On his robe and thigh was written this title: King of kings and Lord of lords.
Wow, what a picture that paints of our GOD! Too often when we think of JESUS as someone who is wimpy, the pale, skinny figurine with him holding the lamb. And while He is gentle, He is only so because He chooses to be. We serve a GOD who loves us and endured the cross so we may be in relationship with Him and may grow to become everything He created us to be.
When all the crap of life is staring you down, daring you to make a move yet trying to hold you paralyzed. Or your lying your head on your pillow feeling completely overwhelmed and wondering if GOD hears you or fear you can't hear Him. . . Just remember He is a strong warrior (Revelation 19), He has called you His child (Romans 8:15), and He is working in your situation whether you see it or not (Romans 8:28).
He fights for the hearts of His children
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Come ande Listen
I'm sure most everyone knows the David Crowder song "Come and Listen". I woke up this morning with it in my head, and it took me a few minutes till I woke up enough and settled with my coffee before it hit me that it was GOD calling out to me. And when I realized it I stopped in my hallway for such a sweet moment with my Creator. And over and over I just heard the melody "Come and Listen, come to the Water and draw near" in my heart.
And I was filled with love and awe that my GOD loves me so much. Not only is He always here when I need Him, but also He is calling for me to come and spend time with Him.
Too often it becomes a common place for us that He is available for us. But the amazing thing is, the more we spend time with Him, the more we will hear Him calling for us and telling us He loves us. AND then the more easily we can distinguish His voice and His Wisdom from everything else coming at us. When we recognize His voice, then we can identity when the enemy is lieing to us and trying to get us to believe lies about ourselves. And then we can more fully walk out this life as the people GOD created us to be.
John 10:27 My sheep recognize my voice. I know them, and they follow me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6-K7WuY17Q
And I was filled with love and awe that my GOD loves me so much. Not only is He always here when I need Him, but also He is calling for me to come and spend time with Him.
Too often it becomes a common place for us that He is available for us. But the amazing thing is, the more we spend time with Him, the more we will hear Him calling for us and telling us He loves us. AND then the more easily we can distinguish His voice and His Wisdom from everything else coming at us. When we recognize His voice, then we can identity when the enemy is lieing to us and trying to get us to believe lies about ourselves. And then we can more fully walk out this life as the people GOD created us to be.
John 10:27 My sheep recognize my voice. I know them, and they follow me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6-K7WuY17Q
Monday, November 17, 2008
Concious Thoughts
For those of you who were in Crave last night, we talked about how important it is to be aware of our thoughts. To be aware of which thoughts are ours and which are from the enemy. We also talked about pacts we have made in the past with the enemy. Pacts that hold us back and keep us feeling insecure and inferior and a host of other feelings which keep us from stepping out into becoming the people we were created to be.
So what have you been thinking about today? Take a moment and think back on your internal conversation and identify which thoughts do not line up with the Word.
Philippians 4:8 ". . . Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. "
So what have you been thinking about today? Take a moment and think back on your internal conversation and identify which thoughts do not line up with the Word.
Philippians 4:8 ". . . Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. "
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
This morning I woke up and had the song, "Making Memories of Us" in my head. Have you ever listened to the lyrics of that song? I think it speaks so clearly of the love GOD has for us.
The first time I heard it I was in the car, having one of those times where I'm not sure what's going on and wondering if I'm missing GOD and just screwing it all up.
Then this came on the radio. . .
I'm gonna be here for you baby. And I'll be a man of my own word Speak the language in a voice that you have never heard. I wanna sleep with you forever. And I wanna die in your arms. In a cabin by a meadow where the wild bees swarm. And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you. . .
And maybe I identify with this more because I am a woman, and a more emotional one, but GOD opened my eyes to how much He loves me through that song.
Then again on Monday, I was in a time of doubting if I was on the right track, and desperately needing the arms of the one who loves me and I heard. . .
And I'm gonna make you a promise. If there's life after this. I'm gonna be there to meet you . . . And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you. And I'll earn your trust making memories of us.
And He does. He so earns my trust daily, and amazingly He is so patient with me with my distrust. He doesn't get frustrated at my asking Him to prove Himself to me over and over. Instead He daily earns my trust with each memory we make daily.
This really speaks to the truth that 1 Corinthians 13:4 says “Love is patient. . . “ And He is. He is so patient with us.
The first time I heard it I was in the car, having one of those times where I'm not sure what's going on and wondering if I'm missing GOD and just screwing it all up.
Then this came on the radio. . .
I'm gonna be here for you baby. And I'll be a man of my own word Speak the language in a voice that you have never heard. I wanna sleep with you forever. And I wanna die in your arms. In a cabin by a meadow where the wild bees swarm. And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you. . .
And maybe I identify with this more because I am a woman, and a more emotional one, but GOD opened my eyes to how much He loves me through that song.
Then again on Monday, I was in a time of doubting if I was on the right track, and desperately needing the arms of the one who loves me and I heard. . .
And I'm gonna make you a promise. If there's life after this. I'm gonna be there to meet you . . . And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you. And I'll earn your trust making memories of us.
And He does. He so earns my trust daily, and amazingly He is so patient with me with my distrust. He doesn't get frustrated at my asking Him to prove Himself to me over and over. Instead He daily earns my trust with each memory we make daily.
This really speaks to the truth that 1 Corinthians 13:4 says “Love is patient. . . “ And He is. He is so patient with us.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Sunday night I had the opportunity to share with everyone who was at Crave something that GOD revealed to me. I have become way too civilized and have come to fit in a mold. I have allowed GOD's call on my life of "Come" then "GO" to simply become "Come and Listen". It had started to become all about me and how I got fed or how I felt during worship or what I wanted. I was simply becoming a woman of selfish faith because when I take out the "Go" part of the mandate my eyes move from being about spreading GOD's glory to all about what He's doing in me.
While I never want to take for granted the work GOD is doing in me and how much He s growing and changing me everyday, I have to daily remind myself that He's not doing it for me. He is changing me from glory to glory so that I may be a vessel of his glory. So I can be JESUS with skin on.
When I keep that in mind my daily focus turns from looking only in the mirror and seeing what He's done for me, but then also opening my front door, back door, and my garage door to see who GOD is placing in my path that I can be JESUS to. He may even have placed someone in the back of my yard in the corner of the fence and I have to look to find them. I must remember that His feet are my feet. If I don't go, he won't go. And His hands are my hands, if I don't help He won't. Not because He can't. He is all powerful, but He has designed this world to include us in His story.
True if I don't go, He will raise up someone else. But do I really want that to be my story? That GOD placed someone outside my garage door for me to help and show His love to, but I didn't see them because I was too busy looking in the mirror and admiring the changes GOD has made in me.
How can I keep the "Go" part continually a priority without sacrificing the "Come" part of making sure I spend time sitting at His feet and learning to hear His heart beat so mine may beat with His?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
